Arabesque
by TheLucky666
Summary: After failing to get the Snow Crystal, Ichigo and his friends-thieves decide to try again! This time, the trail will lead them to no other place then the Royal Palace, straight into the palm of Sultan Grimmjow and his not-so loyal entourage. GrimmIchi, AU; based on the Aladdin parody episode
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own Bleach or anything else associated with it.

Well, well, well... Here I went and did the unforgivable thing of starting another story while still not completing the previous ones... Hmmm...

Anyway, this one demanded (they all do, don't they?) to be written, so... Writing is like drugs, I concluded. When you write one story (or chapter), you'll have to write another.

Anyways, I can't believe no one came to this idea before me. Was the 'Aladdin parody episode' (that's how I call it) so lacking in inspiration? Or everybody except me jumped over it, because it's a filler? It's episode 287, if you're interested...

Still, as usual... I hope you enjoy what I've started.

* * *

**ARABESQUE**

**Description:** After failing to get the Snow Crystal, Ichigo and his friends-thieves decide to try again! This time, the trail will lead them to no other place then the Royal Palace, straight into the palm of Sultan Grimmjow and his (not-so) loyal entourage.

**Pairings: **GrimmIchi

**Warnings:** AU, slightly OOC, maybe slightly cheesy, fluff, slightly crack, possible mindf*, possible pathetic romance, and most definitely: exaggerated richness of our beloved Sultan

**Genres: **Romance, Comedy, Drama, Intrigue, Parody(?)

**Music Recommendation:** Hossam Ramzy, Orphaned Land, Tarkan (I'll add more if need be);

Grimmjow's Theme: Sehr Oyunik (The Magic in Your Eyes) by Hossam Ramzy - Ichigo's Theme: Hepsi Senin Mi? (Who Do you Think You Are?) by Tarkan

* * *

Somewhere in the desert, Ichigo, the leader of a small group of thieves, sneezed. He sneezed abruptly and loudly and in such a way that everybody around him flinched. Even the flames of the campfire flinched.

The 'everybody' included only three people (minus the fire), all of them members of Ichigo's group: Uryuu, Sado and Orihime.

"Sorry, people! I don't know what got into me."-said Ichigo, sniffing.

"Next time, please warn us first!"-answered Uryuu, dramatically placing a hand over his heart. He always had a comment on every thing Ichigo said.

"It's probably just the sand."-concluded Sado, a gentle giant of the group who never spoke much.

"You think?"- piped in Orihime-"Maybe it's the aliens!" Orihime always had weird ideas, and always tried to think positive.

"Uh, Orihime. People still aren't supposed to know about the aliens in this day and age."-reminded her Uryuu.

"Oh, is that so?"- she asked in bewilderment.

Ichigo stared at his friends with a smile. They were a strange lot, but he was happy to have them with him.

"Anyway, you're drawing us off topic."-said Uryuu, pushing his glasses up -"We were talking about the Snow Crystal."

Ichigo broke out of his stupor, and quickly rejoined the conversation.

"Yeah… Last time we tried to get it, the things didn't go so smoothly."- he said, slightly grumpy.

"Well, this time I have a genial plan that's bound to work!"- yelled Uryuu.

"Nobody was blaming you, Uryuu."-smiled Orihime. Sado nodded to show he agreed with Orihime.

"OK, let's hear what you have!"-said Ichigo rebelliously with a smug smile on his face, slightly teasing Uryuu. The hands he placed on his legs with his elbows in the air only amplified the effect.

With a nerve twitching in his temple, Uryuu started.

"Well, here's the plan: Were going to sneak into Urahara's mansion (as you already know, Urahara's a wealthy merchant who holds many incredible treasures in his possession), we're going to steal the Snow Crystal, and then we're going to sell it at an unreasonable price!" – he concluded in triumph with a grin on his face.

"And where's the genial plan in that?"-Ichigo frowned- "It's exactly the same as the last time!"-he hollered.

"But, that's exactly what's so genial about it!"-Uryuu tried to persuade him, stupidly maniacal grin on his face. He leaned into Ichigo's face. –"It's exactly the same as the plan from before! There's no way they're going to expect that!"

They stared at each other for a while; Ichigo frowning and Uryuu smirking.

"There's no way-…"-started Ichigo.

"OK! Let's cast a vote!"-yelled Uryuu, interrupting him and turning towards the other two.

"OI!"-Ichigo yelled.

"Who's up for this plan?!"-asked Uryuu loudly.

"Meeee!"-Orihime raised her hand.

"Muh."-Sado agreed, nodding.

"Wait, wait, wait! That's completely insane!"-said Ichigo.

"Oh, come on, Ichigo!"-Uryuu turned to him.- "Be a sport!"

"Yes, Ichigo! Be a sport!"-Orihime helped out.

Ichigo stared at them, frowning, for a couple of seconds.

"I'm going to go with this, right?"-he asked no one in particular.

IIIIIIIIIIIII

Using Bawabawa (also known as "The Giant Eel Posing as a Camel") they arrived quickly to the city of Karasaray, and then quickly and silently sneaked up to the beautiful mansion of the terribly rich merchant Urahara.

It is a beautiful residence with a giant garden, but since it pales in comparison with the Royal Palace (and because our heroes passed through it quickly and during the night), I won't even bother describing it.

Once inside, Ichigo and his friends had to move silently, while trying not to trigger any of the possible traps. They snuck in to the room where the Snow Crystal was supposed to be last time, with ease. The room was just like they remembered. Countless valuable art work, jewellery, weapons and jewels were placed in the exact same places. That old chest was also sitting at its old spot, right in the middle of the room.

This time, Ichigo sincerely hoped Uryuu's plan would work.

They approached the chest, and just like the last time, Uryuu picked the lock open. When they lifted the lid, they were in for quite the surprise. In a gush of confetti that showered them, there was Urahara jumping out of the chest, like a jack-in-the-box. Everybody screamed.

"Ta-daaaaah!"-Urahara yelled, with a silly smile on his face, fanning away at the air with his ridiculous feathered fan.

Almost instantly, Ichigo grabbed him by the collar.

"You crazy motherf-! I almost had a heart attack!"-he yelled.

Urahara kept on smiling.

"So terribly sorry, Mr. Burglar!" – he fanned at Ichigo with his fan- "Could you please unleash my coat? It's getting wrinkly."

Grudgingly, Ichigo complied.

"Good."-Urahara fanned himself, smiling.-"I see you've been robbing people again. Still after the Snow Crystal, are we?"

Nobody gave him the answer, just a lot of frowns.

"What game are you planning, old man?"-asked Ichigo-"Why aren't we arrested yet?"

"Well, that's an interesting story, actually!"-he started- "Seeing you're here, I take it you don't know?" The thieves looked at him curiously.

"I don't have the Snow Crystal."-he grinned at them-"At least, not anymore."

"What are you-?"-started Uryuu.

"The Vizier's people!"-yelled Urahara-"They came here and took away quite a bit of my treasure. Among all other things, the Snow Crystal, and a sword I treasured dearly. Said it was tax…"

He clasped his fan close, and pointed with it at Ichigo.

"So! Here's my proposition to you burglars: Return the sword to me, and take the Snow Crystal as your payment!" He smiled, and offered his hand to Ichigo.

"Do we have a deal?"

"Sounds good to me."-said Ichigo after eyeing Urahara's hand for a couple of seconds. He reached with his hand to shake with Urahara, when Uryuu held him off.

"You sure are a stingy fellow, wanting to return the tax they've taken. Isn't tax used to help the people?"-he eyed Urahara suspiciously.

Urahara smiled. "You're quite the naïve one. Do you really think so? Well, anyway, the way they did it was a straight out robbery. I get the feeling the Grand Vizier is in a mood for an undeserved promotion, if you get what I'm saying."

"That's impossible."-deadpanned Ichigo-"Isn't the Sultan the only one in the higher position than the Grand Vizier?"

Uryuu facepalmed.

"Ugh… I'll explain it to you later."-he patted Ichigo on the shoulder.

"So… Where is the Snow Crystal?"-asked Orihime politely.

"Well, that would be the Royal Treasury, of course."-smiled Urahara at her. At those words both Uryuu and Sado turned a bit blue in the face.

"Eeh~? So you want us to break into the Royal Treasury?"-asked Ichigo, than smirked. "Sounds interesting. We'll do it!"

Uryuu looked at him as if he had lost his mind.

"Ok, then."-smiled Urahara-"I'll trust in your capable hands! Mind you, there's no backing out now. If you flee, trust me, I'll know. Well, it's not like you'll be able to… I'll be off to bed then. I trust it you can find the exit?"- And with that, he was out of sight.

Uryuu stood with his mouth opened wide.

"Are you CRAZY?!"-he yelled at Ichigo. "Do you know what you just consent to do?"

Ichigo ignored him completely.

"Huh? I wonder why go through all the trouble of hiring us… Why couldn't he just walk up to the Sultan and ask his sword back?"-he wondered aloud.

Uryuu grabbed him by the shoulders, and positioned him so they were facing each other.

"That's because he's not crazy! Moreover, he's rather sly!"-he was growing bluer in the face with each second.-"Haven't you ever, EVER in your crazy, uninformed life even heard one, I say ONE, TINY rumour about his Royal Highness?"

"No."-deadpanned Ichigo.

Uryuu growled. "Then listen carefully! I'm about to draw out for you the amount of danger you've just placed us in."

Both Sado and Orihime closed in, as if to make sure every word Uryuu says will stay engraved deeply into their minds.

"It is said"-started Uryuu-"that his Majesty is a man like no other. They say he's a man that favours battle over women. It is rumoured that upon coming to power he, with his own hand, massacred the entire Royal harem which counted over hundred women. It is said he executes people by himself. It's said that he goes to war with neighbouring countries almost weekly. I even heard he exchanged his fiancée for a sabre. A sabre!"

"Eeh~… Some psycho."-said Ichigo barely interested.

"Were you listening?"-yelled Uryuu-"What would happen if we got caught? We would be killed! Even worse! Tortured, than killed!"

"Well, basically, what you're saying is that we just have to pay attention not to get caught."-concluded Ichigo, carefree- "It's as simple as that."

"You!"-Uryuu was nearly stomping from anger-"That's not simple at all! It's the Royal Treasury were speaking off! Can you even imagine how tight the security will be there?"

"Umm… Sorry to interrupt…"-Orihime piped in.-"But, what do the rumours say; what does the Sultan look like?" When Uryuu gave her a weird look, she added: "You know, so we can avoid him." She smiled.

He sighed; he already had decided to answer her.

"Well, I've never seen him myself, but rumours say that he's tall and irregularly strong. They say his teeth are sharp as those of a wild animal. The rumours also say that his hair is the colour of the sky…"

"Sky?!"-Ichigo repeated in bewilderment.

"Yes, sky. Don't interrupt!"-Ishida spat at him, and resumed his talking: "And I've heard his gaze is so strong it simply smothers you when he looks at you. People say nobody can look him in the eye. The rumours say his voice is rough and loud as thunder…"

Just when Uryuu was starting to be engulfed into his rumours, Ichigo laughed.

"I think your rumours are as true as a fairy tale! They're just rumours, so cut it out. We're gonna go in and out, and nobody's gonna notice us. We just have to be cautious. Now come, we have to take a rest before we start planning out the break in."

And that he started towards the exit. Sado and Orihime followed suit.

"Mark my words, Ichigo. You're going to regret this."-said Uryuu to himself and went after them.

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And so endeth the chapter 1... I hope you enjoyed and are going to review. I have terrible computer problems.. I hope it'll get fixed soon...


	2. Chapter 2

Here it is, my lovelies~! Just like I promised, an update to "Arabesque"!

Personally, I found the first chapter slightly rushed and silly. Therefore, I'll go slower now. But, the silly remains. :D

This chapter's not beta'd, so forgive me for any (grammar) mistakes!

Enjoy the chapter! :)

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CHAPTER 2: STRATEGY MEETING

The early morning of the next day caught our heroes in a slightly run-down inn. They have decided to stay the night in a place where they could clearly see the imposing construction of white, their next target, towering over the brown and busy streets of the city.

The whole group gathered in only one room with a couple of beds, with cheap and slightly greased sheets on top of them and a single, washed out carpet. It was, after all, the only thing within their budget.

That morning, Ichigo was awoken from his sleep due to the rising racket and a whole palette of smells coming from the street vendors, who were setting up their stalls or shouting out their exclusive offers or loudly bargaining with the possible customers.

'Why is the marketplace right below our window?'-he thought, grumpily.

When he wasn't so sleepy, he actually loved the marketplace. The many things that were sold there - ranging from various foods, expensive silk or jewellery, animals, house utensils, carpets, as well as many services offered there, like the tailor or the barber and entertainers, such us snake charmers; all wrapped up in an indescribable crowd of all possible (and sometimes impossible) people - made a special experience available even to the poor. It was a really special place. There were merchants, there were women and children, and there were rich people, poor people, as well as slaves and Ichigo's lot – thieves. The marketplace was a heaven for thieves. In that entire crowd, it was easy to slip something off of a stall, or inconspicuously untie a money sachet from the silk belt of a fat and red faced rich guy. But, the price for getting caught was a bit too high – having your hands hacked off. Luckily, none of Ichigo's friends nor him suffered through that one before.

Suddenly, it occurred to Ichigo that simply waltzing in and out of the Royal Treasury was no small feat. After all, it meant breaking into the Palace…

Taking a deep breath, he slowly sat up. His bed sheets smelled vaguely of palm oil, he noticed.

"Good morning, Ichigo!" – Orihime was the first one to greet him.

"Good morning."- repeated Sado after her. He was looking out of the window a few seconds ago. Uryuu was the only one who wasn't there.

"Ah, good morning." –Ichigo repeated, absentmindedly.- "Where's Uryuu?" –he said, looking around.

"He went out to bring food."-Orihime smiled-"But, he's been gone for a while. I wonder if everything's alright…"-she added.

"No need to worry about me, Orihime!"-said Uryuu, entering the room. He carried some stuff in his hands. –"Oh, you're finally up, Ichigo."-he noted in a colder tone.

Ichigo's eye twitched. He didn't need this right after getting up.

"I went to see _it_, as a scout. I also brought food and some stuff we could use."-continued Uryuu.

"It?"-wondered Ichigo -"Anyway, you seem to be really up for the case. What happened to 'we'll get killed'?"

"It!"-yelled Uryuu, than explained whispering: "The target, the Palace!" He pushed his glasses up. "I gave up trying to reason with you at the very beginning. Knowing you, even if it is mortal peril, if you got your mind set on it, nothing I say would change your decision. So, the best I can do is try to prolong your life even for a bit."-he concluded.

"Heh! And just when I thought of backing off."-teased Ichigo.

"WHAA-!"

"I'm joking."

"Uryuu, what do you have there?"- Orihime interrupted them, pointing at the stuff Uryuu was carrying.

"Huh? This? Well, here. I brought some bread, fruit and dates."- He handed the things over to Orihime.

"Guh! No meat?!" –complained Ichigo.

"Don't complain!"-yelled Uryuu- "Meat is too expensive! Besides, who in the World eats meat for breakfast?!"

"Well, I can't live on fruit! And what am I supposed to eat that bread with?"-Ichigo continued with the fight.

"Ok, Ok!"- Orihime intervened again- "What are those other things?"

Sending one last mean look in Ichigo's direction, Uryuu continued where he left off.

"Here's water."-he handed over a pot to Orihime –"And here, I bought some rope, in case we might need it for the break in."

"Oi."- Ichigo frowned –"And what's that expensive looking thing?"

"Oh, this?"-said Uryuu stupidly, lifting a long, orange, silk scarf with golden dimes sewn onto it; the dimes jingled even on the slightest movement of the scarf. –"It's pretty, isn't it?"

"Don't tell me you just blew all of our savings on a completely useless thing!"-hollered Ichigo – "What are we going to eat?!"

"Well, there was no helping it!"-Uryuu retorted- "The merchant was really charismatic!"

Ichigo facepalmed.

"Uh… That's kind of his job, Uryuu."-commented Sado.

"Well!"-Ichigo sighed and rubbed his eyes- "I suppose, we could try to find a use for that thing. If anything we could re-sell it." He came up to Uryuu, grabbed the scarf, and stopped in his tracks.

"Somehow… It's really silky."-he stated stupidly, starting to pet the scarf, causing it to jingle even more.

"Isn't it?"- Uryuu joined him, grinning in triumph.

"Umm… What about the break in?"- asked Sado.

"Ah, yes… About that…"-Uryuu broke out from his goofy stupor, and took off his glasses to wipe them off. Putting them back on, he spoke seriously:

"I did some research. It appears that the best time for the break in would be tonight. The Sultan will be returning from battle, so the viziers and the other lot will prepare a feast for him. While they're busied with trying to please his Majesty, we will sneak in unnoticed. Now, listen very carefully (you especially, Kurosaki), this is important. The Palace is huge! It's easy to get lost, so it's very important to always stick together. There are four wings: North, South, East and West, and six floors. The Eastern Wing is the most isolated one, and that's where the Treasury is. It used to be the Wing reserved for the women, but well… The harem used to be there, but now it's a back-up Treasury sort-of. The bad news is that the Sultan's new (or should I say current) bedroom is also located on that side of the palace. But, if my calculations are correct, we don't need to worry, because at that time the Sultan will be present at the banquet in the South Wing of the Palace. I managed to get us…"-there he took a scroll from inside his shirt, and placed it on the floor- "…a map of all the secret hallways of the Palace. And that's how we're going to be moving around."

He gave his friends a smug look, while they got around the map to take a peek into it.

Ichigo made a face.

"I don't get it!"-he waived his hand – "But, never mind. You'll be leading us through this, anyway."

"Guh!"-Uryuu protested- "You took the task, and now you're shoving all of the responsibility onto somebody else. How very nice of you!"

Ichigo gave him a bored look.

"I'm not even going to respond to that."-he said, scratching himself behind the ear.

Uryuu inhaled deeply.

"Never mind. I was going to take the lead, anyway."

"Then why are you complaining then?" –asked Ichigo, speaking more for himself. The others gathered around to eat while discussing the details of the plan.

IIIIIIIIIIIII

One of the first obstacles they had to pass was the Great Wall surrounding the Palace. The plan was this:

Since the Sultan and his soldiers will be passing through the city on their way there, a whole mass of people will be out on the streets to behold the sight of richly equipped and dressed warriors. The Gates will be opened, so in all that mess and ruckus, Ichigo's bunch is going to sneak to the other side of the wall. It was risky, of course (after all, it's entering through the front doors!), but that was an option that bore greatest chances of success. At least, in their opinion. To that end, they made sure to put on brown, hooded coats; the same kind some of the staff wore when they went outside the castle.

It was sunset when they moved out.

Ichigo let Orihime and Sado make a distance, before he pulled Uryuu to the side. Uryuu gave him an irritated look. Ichigo opened his mouth to say something, but Uryuu cut across him:

"You can thank me later, Kurosaki."

Ichigo made a slight nod.

"Why did you agree to this, really?"-he asked.

Uryuu shook off Ichigo's hand off of him, and pushed up his glasses.

"Like I said, when you have your mind set on something, there's nothing that can stop you from doing otherwise. The only thing I can do is try to prolong your life, even for a bit. And not just me, but Sado and Orihime, as well."

He looked Ichigo in the eyes.

"They're trying. But, they can hardly keep up with you. Orihime, especially. If. If something happens to them, Ichigo, I'll never forgive you."

He turned around to walk away, and spoke more to himself:

"Even though I hate to admit it, we're all your friends. If you're going to do something stupid, even if we can't make you back away from the idea, we can at least look out for you."

Ichigo heard him and smiled.

IIIIIIIIIIIII

The crowd that mingled and pushed around to get closer for a better look was so great, that one stuck within it felt a disturbing lack of personal space. Sometimes it felt as if your neighbours united in the idea of using their bodies to lift you off the ground; so hard was to move in that amazing mass of people. Breathing was a privilege there. If you were lucky not to be standing next to somebody who obviously had garlic for lunch today, then you were squeezed between two bigger aunts extraordinarily eager to get a look, whose perfume was probably on the list of the strongest perfumes ever.

Unfortunately for him, Ichigo was stuck exactly between those two plump ladies. It made him feel so awkward and distressed, that he barely noticed when the procession of war heroes started passing by.

That was like a sign to the crowd. Some held their breath, some began cheering, and some (like the majority of the women) started gossiping. Ichigo, who was till now fighting to stay on his feet, as well as to note where his friends were, just stopped. And everything stopped. Everything, except the strong and proud soldiers. Their horses were oozing strength and magnificence. The men who rode those horses were even more magnificent. Their armours and their weapons mirrored the Sun. It was hard to tell whether the swords were made of gold, or it was just a skilful play of the sunshine. The weapons! Swords, sabres, spears, shields; all such an example of mastery skill of their maker. It burned inside Ichigo. He never had the money to afford such a thing. And he would oh-so-gladly have a sword of his own.

Suddenly, in the corner of his eye, already far away, he noticed a silk coat of the light blue shade. The person who wore it had an air of undeniable authority around him, and a scabbard made of pure gold hanging from his hip. The Sultan!

In that moment, Sado pulled Ichigo by the collar of his shirt. When Ichigo turned around, Sado mumbled:

"Ishida gave us the signal."

Glancing once more towards the person who was out of his sight, Ichigo followed Sado to where his friends were, and then into the Palace.

Hopefully.

* * *

I want to buy poor Ichigo a sword. :( That, and Grimmjow almost saw him. :)

**IMPORTANT NOTE:** Since I've been hearing about being supportive of the fans' vivid imagination, I've decided to comply and post "censored" versions of chapters on here, while the "uncut" versions will be available on my Tumblr. :) Mind you, not all the chapters have their "uncut" versions, so I'll make sure to announce at the beginning of every chapter if there's an "uncut" version available.

Detailed explanations you can find on my Tumblr: no6isroyalblue dot tumblr dot com. :)

Even if you're not interested in any of that, but you'd like to talk with me or something, you're very welcome to drop by. :D


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